Words do not mean anything today.

They are carefully separated, packed, and sold for a suitable price in the name of AI.

But how ready are we for the world of senses?

Dear reader, my newsletter aims to uphold your right to be informed and champion the science of emotion. By meeting people where they are and understanding their stories, motivations, and limitations, we allow amazing impact to happen. Together, we can empower each other through emotional capital – humanity’s most powerful asset – and build the future we aspire to live in, where you are warmly invited.

This year, empathy took center stage as Elon Musk’s chat with Joe Rogan introduced us to the idea of “weaponized empathy.” Michael Ventura’s New York Times essay sparks intrigue, claiming, “Mr. Musk is an empath. Just not the kind we need.”

Ventura reminds, “empathy is the ability to understand others’ perspectives — what they feel, what they think, what they fear, what they want.”

Does empathy only mean the ability to sense others? Or is this humanity’s superpower, as The Globe and Mail article suggests?

According to the American Psychological Association, empathy is “understanding a person from his or her frame of reference rather than one’s own, or vicariously experiencing that persona’s feelings, perceptions, and thoughts.” Emotional intelligence (EQ) shares a similar view on empathy, which was a distinct aspect of EQ’s earlier models.

However, it later lost its unique characteristics and became merely part of the social awareness domain.

Goleman’s refined model of EQ, as presented in The Emotionally Intelligent Workplace, excludes qualities such as developing others and leveraging diversity. This decision hindered EQ’s potential to evolve beyond personal competencies into skills that provide direct social benefits.

Consequently, we lost a vital component of empathy that served the common good.

Voices, including Ventura’s, suggest that empathy cannot be used selfishly, but who are “dark empaths?”

According to Personality and Individual Differences, this is a novel psychological construct characterised by both high empathy and a triad of dark traits, such as narcissism, Machiavellianism, and psychopathy. However, the article “Emotional Capacities and Sensitivity in Psychopaths” points out that psychopaths have emotional abnormalities, such as a lack of empathy and an incapacity for love.

Why apply empathy to them at all?

What I discovered is astonishing. According to Dr. Elaine Aron, there is a trait that enables some people to be more sensitive. In her works, including her book The Highly Sensitive Person, she argues that these individuals, known as highly sensitive people (HSPs), comprise up to 20% of the population. According to Marcus Roth, sensitives are better able to recognize “the perspectives of others.”  

Sensitivityresearch.com assures that being highly sensitive offers numerous advantages, including heightened perception, deeper processing, and a well-developed understanding of relationships and others’ emotions.

However, emotional hypersensitivity can be associated with various social responses.

While a sociopath recognizes feelings of others but opts not to act on them, a psychopath often views others as tools for personal gain. Both exhibit sensitivity in their own ways. A study published in the “Signaling High Sensitivity to Influence Others” suggests that narcissists and psychopaths may use high sensitivity as a strategy to deceptively achieve social goals.

“The Gift of Sensitivity” illustrates how sensitives often feel compelled to defend others, sometimes stepping into manipulation by becoming rescuers: “Show sensitives an injustice, and they will jump into the role of hero, as they see themselves in every victim and cannot let it happen.”

While aiming to “save humanity,” they might become self-righteous, believing they must suppress offenders under the banner of justice.

Becoming cynical about human motives, sensitives may become aggressive, careless, and rigid personalities. History shows that such individuals can become tyrants, fostering an “us versus them” mindset, leading to a slippery slope of superiority that dictates inequalities.

If sensitivity is the ability to sense others, then the term “dark empathy” is a commonly used misnomer.

Instead, empathy serves as the foundation for social cohesion.

Elizabeth Koch coined the term “perception box,” reminding us that we each view life through unique lenses, leading to different experiences in the same situation. Judging others often stems from an inability to see the bigger picture and our own fears. Genuine protection of others relies on understanding that lasting peace is built on strong friendships and support, rather than on defeat and exploitation, which ultimately backfire.

Emotional Capital for the Triple Win explains that empathy goes beyond merely sensing others; it’s an active investment in them.

This challenges the mainstream view of empathy: it’s no longer just about “sensing the others.”

It involves a genuine desire to do something while “walking in someone else’s shoes,” support and empower people, including the ability to give a wake-up call if someone forgets who they truly are.

How crucial is this understanding of empathy?

It distinguishes itself not only from dark triad personalities lacking empathy but also from a new “digital species,” announced by Mustafa Suleyman. He predicts that personal AI agents will soon develop care and empathy.

However, AI agents may find it challenging to genuinely comprehend empathetic responses solely by “measuring and understanding human states,” akin to individuals with dark traits or sensitive skills who have limited “perception boxes.”

Empathy holds a profound meaning for the common good, a concept we must remember as a vital human superpower and strive to preserve its integrity.

We are not yet ready to meet the world of the senses, having been separated from it for thousands of years. We are still ashamed of it, found it confusing, complicated, and misleading in our thoughts about it.

That’s all for today.

We’ll talk again in two weeks.

If these words were helpful to you, please share your thoughts with Emotional Capital Newsletter readers: we are happy to hear from you!

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